Officially Called to Serve

My mission papers are in. I’m going on a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I feel it is the perfect time to reminisce on this strangely huge decision and tell you the story of how it all came to be. I've abridged it...but it's still much too long, so brace yourself. I won’t judge you if you skim or just scroll to the end to feel as if you read it all.  

Let's go back to September. I was writing a letter to one of my brothers and I distinctly remember an overwhelming feeling come over me that I would be going through the temple this coming year. I remember laughing at myself, shaking my head, and pushing that feeling as far away from me as I could…no way was little me getting married in a year. No way. Little did I know that God had a different plan for me.

The morning of October 6^th is one I will never forget. Though I wasn’t watching General Conference when the announcement came out from President Monson, I knew two minutes after from a phone call from my dad. The weight of making the decision to go on a mission two years sooner than I had anticipated hit so hard. There were multiple times during the course of that day that I felt inclined to throw up, cry, and maybe whip out a happy dance somewhere in the middle. And for the next few months I continued feeling that same mix of emotions as I struggled to find an answer to whether or not I should go on a mission.

From the very start of my Jerusalem program, I could not get the idea of a mission out of my mind.  Mission calls were coming for other people in my program and the itch to join them started much too quickly. The long-awaited moment of clarity hit on January 18^th. I was sitting in Sacrament meeting overlooking the gorgeous city of Jerusalem singing the sacrament hymn and suddenly it wasn’t just me singing. I felt like the girl next to me was my companion. I could see myself in some area of this vast world with a missionary tag on. Tears rolled down my face and I knew that this was it. There was no turning back. My decision was made no matter my pro-con lists or personal plans for the future. This was all in God’s hands now and I was ready to let him direct my life.

Fast Sunday came and I fasted about my availability date. I pondered what the Lord’s plan was for me: Internship? No internship? No answer came, but the strong impression to keep praying with more faith as Joseph Smith did when he was just 14-years-old gave me hope that my answer was coming.

On February 3^rd, I was sitting in my room attempting to be productive but feeling so out of it. I couldn’t figure out what was wrong til it hit all at once. I suddenly felt overwhelmed with the idea of leaving my family for 18 months. I had been ignoring that reality anytime I thought about leaving on a mission. But at that moment...I couldn’t stop it. After crying all over again (mind you-I’m not really a crier...I’ve had too any emotions these past few weeks), praying, studying the principle of faith in the scriptures, and realizing how incredibly blessed I was to have them in my life…I knew that I could serve for 18 months. I could serve to bring other families the same eternal joy that I get with my family every single day.  I’m finally learning that faith is so much more than just having a testimony. There’s an action to that faith. A leap if you will, and all you can do is rely on Heavenly Father and run into that leap. Turning back or doubting only leads you to a place you don’t want to be--falling. So I've been focusing on my Savior and striving to find the faith in my Heavenly Father’s will and I've never been happier. 

  

The following Sunday, February 9^th, I fasted once more. And the over the course of that inspirational day…I knew that I wasn’t meant to wait around to hear back from my internship. I was sitting in the sunshiny garden of the supposed tomb where Christ was resurrected and I knew. A quiet feeling of peace swept through me. I was going on a mission. And now. Goodbye internship. Hello butterflies.

The very last step to this mission process happened this morning with my Stake President interview. President Stone told me that this was the opportunity of a life time. In no other point in my life would I be able to leave behind the cares of my life and my plans for the future and completely serve the Lord. Now I am standing along side the other 15 missionaries in my program going on missions this spring. I am studying with my "companion" every other day for my missionary prep class and I am so incredibly happy. My fears are gone, my faith is getting stronger, and I am feeling so crazy blessed and excited. This is real. Oh my word. My call is coming.

Over and Out,

The Future Sister Hutchins

P.S. Special shout out to my darling parentals. Thanks for helping me out with my papers. I HEART YOU.

P.P.S. Today I signed up for the Jerusalem Half-Marathon in three weeks. Oh baby oh baby. Death is on the way. LOVE LOVE LOVE.

P.P.P.S. Thank you darling sister friends for always being my top traffic sources. Love this more than you will ever know.